(PBS Digital Studios intro plays)

Iggy: Today is the day! All of our hard work has led up to this historic moment. 

Victoria: That's right. Today is the day we restore vitality to this frozen, lifeless corpse.

Iggy: I, I, I was building up to that, but first I was gonna say we've graduated medical school and can now truly call this show Frankenstein, M.D.

Victoria: Oh. Right.

Iggy: C'mon, it's exciting! Aren't you excited? I was thinking, once we were done here, we could go to like, I dunno, Olive Garden or something. We could celebrate. Red Lobster? It's your call.

Victoria: But the important thing is--

Iggy: We're bringing Robert back to life.

Victoria: Ughhh. Not Robert exactly. Something new.

Iggy: Yeah, but it's more dramatic to say Robert.

Victoria: My work doesn't need marketing. Once people see this cadaver living and breathing and walking around, they'll know the importance of what I've done.

Iggy: Yeah. What you've done.

Victoria: And they will study my findings and they'll duplicate my results and then they'll have to admit that a girl, just like the ones they ignore and ostracize and belittle, unlocked the mysteries of life and death.

Iggy: Yeah. Hate to be those guys.

Victoria: I couldn't have done it without your help, you know?

Iggy: Yeah, I know, right?

Victoria: Good. Now go grab that generator, my glucose monitor is browning out.

Iggy: On it. (grunts)

Victoria: Too heavy?

Iggy: No, no, I got it. Ow.

Victoria: Don't hurt yourself. I have a lot more stuff I need you to lift today.

Iggy: Ahh. Hey, so, what do you want to call this thing?

Victoria: What?

Iggy: Well, you keep saying it's not Robert, it's not Robert, so what do you want to name it?

Victoria: He's a subject in an experiment. He doesn't need a name.

Iggy: Well, maybe we should just call him Frankenstein.

Victoria: He's not Frankenstein. I'm Frankenstein.

(Frankenstein, M.D. intro plays)

Victoria: Our present attempt to defrost and revive this subject builds on all the other experiments we've done here in the lab.

Iggy: We've replaced his irreparably damaged bones with new, synthetic versions and grown Robert some new skin infused with spider silk to make it tougher.

Victoria: Not only will his body be more rugged and durable than it was when he was alive, but I suspect he may also be less prone to infection. Iggy, we'll have to devise a test for that. Finally, our various successful attempts at thawing cryo-frozen specimens have allowed us to fine-tune the process, ensuring that the body will be revitalized with no risks to any organs, including the brain.

Iggy: Now, Robert did sustain moderate head trauma before he died.

Victoria: He'll most likely experience significant memory less.

Iggy: Other physical symptoms could include convulsions, seizures, frequent loss of consciousness, numbness in fingers and toes, confusion, slurred speech, he could slip into a coma at pretty much any time.

Victoria: These are outside possibilities, his symptoms will likely be comparable to a bad car accident. Okay. We're ready for some final checks and then it's time. Right now, our cadaver is receiving chilled fluids via an IV, keeping it at a consistent temperature around freezing point. When Iggy hits this button, the subject will be quickly flushed with a warm solution of water, vital nutrients. and minerals, significantly accelerating the reviving process. Do it now.

Iggy: Yes, Dr. Frankenstein.

Victoria: We'll also be transfusing the body with some of Dr. Waldman's artificial blood. When I flip this switch, we'll begin sending periodic bursts of electrical energy directly into the subject's heart, the final step in stimulating his body to restart and resume function activity.

Iggy: Is it safe to have all this equipment routed into a giant oversized switch?

Victoria: I'm a doctor. Not an engineer.

Iggy: Alright. Well. Maybe when Robert's ready, we can have him look at it. He was usually good at that stuff. Okay, he's not even warm yet, he's at 22 degrees.

Victoria: He's almost here. It's working.

Iggy: Okay, we're running out of time here, doc, we're gonna need more power.

Victoria: There isn't any more!

Iggy: Okay, well, maybe we should shut it down and try again. Victoria, get down! Get down!

Victoria: Live! Live! Live! It didn't work. I don't believe it, it didn't work.

Iggy: We got really close. Closer than anyone's ever been.

Victoria: History doesn't remember people who came close. Failure's failure.

Iggy: Are you kidding me? We made like eight breakthroughs an hour these past few weeks! We could write papers about this until we're older than Krempe.

Victoria: I definitely have some ideas for improvements next time.

Iggy: Next time?

Victoria: On the next subject. Where are we gonna get a new corpse? No more editors to pick from, I put the show together myself.

Iggy: I don't know how Waldman's gonna feel about this.

Victoria: I'll take care of him. Your primary concern is the fresh corpse situation.

Iggy: Okay, right. The fresh corpse situation.

Victoria: It's alive.