Hank, today is a very special day because Willy Bubbles the Nerdfighting Puppy is getting his cast off!

[Intro]

There he is, back from school. He's looking at himself right now. He's like, "I am a handsome lad".

John: So, Sarah, how do you feel about Willy getting his cast off?

Sarah: I am pretty excited. It's a really big day for Willy. I mean, he's been building up to this for almost his entire life.

John: Look, Hank—he's still walking with a limp, because he thinks that he has the cast. Willy, come here!

So, Hank, those were the first two things the nerdfighters wanted me to do for them.

1. See more Willy

2. See more of the Yeti

Thing three: Learn a few phrases of the Tobian language.

Hank, even though there are only about 150 people alive who speak the language of Tobian, there's actually a website that's like a repository of all things Tobian, but, just like any foreign language class, the sentences they teach you are absolutely ridiculous. Hank, I am about to speak Tobian to you, and I am not making it up.

"Erimi chen hin chirihetrae." He is sucking the bark of the tree. "Has pamukengie." Take the pumpkin. "Hotowai hapungu chirara." Don't suck on that bone.

Hank, I want to go to the island of Tobi only knowing those three phrases and see how far I get. Do not suck on the bone. Take the pumpkin! Hey, I noticed you're sucking the bark off that tree.

Thing four: Walk somewhere you would usually drive. Perfect—I would usually drive to thing ten, but I'll walk instead and do the rest of the video on the way.

Thing five: Spend more time at the Ning. Hank, I completely agree with the nerdfighters who said we need to spend more time on the Ning. That's why I went in and updated all of the favorite photos including this one and this one and this amazing nerdfighter t-shirt, and I started a tradition of text based Question Tuesdays, and you went in and put in a poll so that people can vote on their favorite Going Postal blurbs.

Speaking of which, thing six: bring back the Nerdfighter Blurbing Book Club. Hank, I am pleased to announce that the new book in our book club is none other than Catcher in the Rye by J. D. Salinger.

Right now, all over the world, teenage nerdfighters are like, "Augh, God, I hate that book," but I don't care—I think we should read it anyway, and then you can tell why you don't like it, and then I'll tell you why you actually should like it. It'll be like English class, only I will have the teaching power. I am the English teacher! I am mad with power!

People in the neighborhood look at me funny when I scream into the camera while walking.

Thing seven: Talk about Wynflete's book giveaway. Hank, as you know, there is one great piece of nerdfighter literature in our canon and that is Mummy, How Do I Know If I'm a Nerdfighter?, written by Debbie Kitto, the Queen of Australian Nerdfighting. There are only, like, five copies of this book in the entire world. You have one. I have one. Our parents have one. Peter has one. Debbie has one. I think secret brother Tom has one, but now Debbie is auctioning off the last remaining copies of Mummy, How Do I Know If I'm a Nerdfighter? to benefit an orphanage in Lebanon. If you want the book, or if you just want to help decrease suck, check out the video on YouTube that this one is a response to.

Thing eight: Hank, the nerdfighters want me to be like you and give an Xbox worth of money to a charity. I did that before I left, actually, to Save the Children. You're welcome, the children.

Thing nine: Do a Question Tuesday next Tuesday. Okay. Nerdfighters, leave me your questions in comments.

And finally, Hank, thing ten: Go into a bookstore and secretly sign one of your books. I'm really glad someone requested this because it's actually one of my favorite secret hobbies, but I'm a little worried that they won't have any of my books.

Uh oh. I was here, like, a week ago, and they had one of my books. Hmm, what ever shall I sign?

Willy says, "Remember to leave your questions in the comments!".