...get. Bald John Green. He's a finisher.

Hold on. Oh the John Greens!

...opposite of what - Oh look at that! Other John Green with a goal out of nothing! I love it! Slide on that snow. I hope you don't hurt yourself.

All that stuff has been hugely helpful. Bald John Green with a beautiful goal.

...right in a row that started with my friend. Oh! What a great goal from Beef Stock.

Should have passed to his husband. So often the case in life and in love.

...beautiful lumps. Bald John Green, he's a finisher.

In adulthood, I don't want it to be my life. Finally a goal. And it's from French de Lalalalalalalalalana! I love that guy.

...life. Yes, finally!

Should have hit the Y-button there. My mistake. I apologize to my family for not hitting the Y-button.

John Green to John Green. Goal! Yes!

...and was just ridiculous. Bald John Green to Other John Green. Put them together in a big hug please. Oh, they are just rolling around on the ground together.

Oh. Oh, oh, ah! Almost one of those funny goals but no. No it's not.

...who they are. And goal!

But he is good at passing.

Goal! It's Parry Parry!

So tough. Goal. What a... Oh he's so tough.

Goalkeepers are very strange people and Fat Lucas is no exception.

...just be extremely hard for the - Boh, Other John Green!

You're not going to miss from there Bald John Green.

Leroy Williamson! Leroy Williamson!

Someone in comments said "Could you please stop it with the homoerotic innuendos about Bald John Green and Other John Green" but they aren't innuendos, for the record. They're married.

Oh, One Size Fitz Hall! Finishes!

You always hear that. Like you always hear people say... Bald John Green. He is a finisher.

Bald John Green, finisher.

It occurs to me that I'm a little bit narcissistic.

A friend and I went on a road trip. Voluptuous Péricard, goal. Oh, it's beautiful.

...fans, like - Oh off the post. And then in!

...different people. We met a lot of people. Other John Green with a goal out of nothing. And then they're just rolling around on the snow like a couple of kids just experiencing pure, raw, unadulterated joy.

...Charlton Athletic. And he finishes because he's a finisher.

Never go down. Oh, beautiful finish.

I was kind of a douche to be honest with you.

Voluptuous Péricard. Goal. Wow.

...wilderness which is increasingly rare. Voluptuous Péricard with a hat-trick.

...ever so that we could - Oh!

...we know. Evidence - Oh. Bald John Green.

Sorry. I'm trying to inspire better slash fiction.

...feeling and you realize that you don't - Oh, Voluptuous Péricard to Other John Green.

...sure about my - Oh! What a great goal from Bald John Green.

...former quarterback of the Boston College Golden Eagles. Oh! Bald John Green to Other John Green!

...that's his real name. Bald John Green! Goal!

...your local independent - Oh! Bald John Green! Beautiful goal! Yes!

I apologize to my fans and my family for the shame that I have caused them.

...particularly big deal. Oh! Bald John Green with a goal.

...cards or something. Like that's cool. Bald John Green.

...and, you know, we will see if he can make - Oh Bodin Bodin, he's a finish... No wait. That was Stone Cold Cteve with the C Austin.

...he's gonna factor in to the - Oh! Voluptuous Péricard.

Someone in a recent comment said I keep saying "The fault does not lie with the players, the fault lies with me, the manager." And someone commented" The Fault In Our Johns".

...than the average center-back. And of course we love goal scoring.

...would be good. Doh, he scored.

Yes!

Yes!

He's a platypus!

Doh, he missed! We won the F.A. Cup! We won the F.A. Cup! Fat Lucas! Oh my God! We won the F.A. Cup! Rage Rampage! Gah! We did it!