Good Morning, Hank, it’s Monday October 6th and today’s video comes to you in ten parts.

Ten? Yes, ten, let’s get on with it. [Intro] Part one, Hank, as you can probably see, I just got back from Berlin, Germany. [German nerdfighters wishing Hank a good morning] Hank, those nerdfighters included Jenny, who got me that flag, and also Recipes from a Hat, whose channel is kinda like songs from a hat only with food. Part two.

But before I was in Berlin, I guess this vlog is going to be unstuck in time, like Billy Pilgrim. I was in Minneapolis, where I met hundreds of made-of-awesome nerdfighters. And Hank, I received several special presents including my first copy of the Spanish translation of Looking for Alaska, and this Shakespearean Insult Gum.

Featuring insults from seven different Shakespearean plays. I’m gonna try some King Lear here. Mmm.

Mmm. You toad-spotted traitor. That is some delicious insulting.

Part three, back to the future. When we got to our hotel room in Berlin, I pulled open the curtains, and there was this beautiful view, and I was like, Sarah, come look at this beautiful view! And I knew there was something a little bit weird about the church, but I couldn’t figure out what was weird about the church until Sarah pointed out to me that most of the steeple had been desteeplefied.

So much for the theory that writers have to have unusually developed powers of observation. Part four, German insults. Hank, it’s no secret that I’m a big fan of German insults.

For instance, I use the world sitzpinkler, which means man who sits to pee, like a hundred times in my second novel. I learned a new one while I was in Germany: Warmduscher. It means, like, a man who takes hot showers.

By the way, Hank, I am a total Warmduscher. Like, I’m actually a Warm-bath-er. Part Five.

Hank, my trip to Berlin featured two moments of really trippy musical incongruity. The first came when I was speaking to high school student in a large room that featured literally every single children’s book published in the GDR, the old communist East Germany. So here I am in this room full of historically important communist children’s books, and the headmaster guy, he brought a CD that kind of reflected the roots of Looking for Alaska [Music Plays] Then, like two hours later, I’m in this tiny bar where the walls are brown but not because they were painted brown, but because of cigarette tar, and it’s the kind of bar where they put antlers on the wall, but they don’t even bother to remove the skulls, and then on comes Everybody Hurts by REM Part six.

Alcoholic dogs. Hank, that bar had a dog that used to hang out and drink there, you’re looking at his picture now. And that reminded me of the Great Fireball Roberts, the alcoholic bulldog in James Crumley’s novel The Last Good Kiss.

Hank, Crumley died a couple weeks ago in your hometown of Missoula, Montana. He was a damn good writer and he’ll be missed. Part seven, Hank, as you know because you helped me do it, all of the events for the Papertowns and Nerdfighting tour are now available on Facebook with up to date information we are no longer using Eventful.com because it has become our mortal enemy.

Long story. If you go to nerdfighters.com and look there on the left, it lists all of the events in order. You can click and RSVP and invite your friends – please invite your friends – and it will be awesome.

Part eight, chess-boxing. So Hank, while I was in Germany, a lot of times when I would go to schools, I wouldn’t actually read my book, on account of how I don’t read or speak German, an actor would. [Actor speaking German.] And it turns out that one of those actors is actually one of the world’s best chess-boxers. One of the World’s best chess-boxers: Hi, Hank, I just had a reading with your brother, John.

It was a wonderful experience and I just want to say, hi I am the, um, runner-up European champion in heavy-weight chess-boxing. John: Chess-boxing alternates between four minutes of the game of chess and two minutes of boxing. You can win by either knock-out or check-mate.

I mean, Hank, that is an actual, literal nerdfighter. Part nine, Hank, my new book, Paper Towns, comes out in ten days, but nerdfighters, if you can’t wait, I’d encourage you to read Let it Snow, a holiday romance anthology by me, Maureen Johnson, and Lauren Myracle. That’s a very masculine cover.

Also, they sent me, like, way too many author copies for Let it Snow, so I’m going to give away five to random commenters on this video. And finally, part ten. Hank, today marks the first day of our month-long Brotherhood 2.0-style vlogging challenge.

So for the first time in almost ten months, I literally mean it when I say Hank, I’ll see you tomorrow. [Outro] P. S. Scavenger hunters.

I love Seattle, I love wizard rock, and I love snakes.