I'm Dr. Lindsey Doe clinical sexologist and host of this sex curious show Sexplanations. Today I'm going to answer a very popular question. How do I eat ass? 

Eating ass also known as tossing the salad, rimming, cleaning the kitchen, playing the rusty trombone, anilingus, and culo sex is actually pretty simple. Step 1: Ask your partner if you can. "Any interest in me licking your asshole the next time I go down on you?" "How would you feel if I made out with your butt while you masturbate?" "Have you ever had a rim job?" 

Step 2: Once you have consent it's time to get ready. Avoid giving anything bad to their asshole and getting anything bad from their asshole. Here are the infections that can go from mouth to anus, and anus to mouth. Herpes; if you have herpes on your mouth, aka cold sores, you can pass it to your partner's asshole even if you don't have an outbreak. And if they have herpes on their asshole, outbreak or not, they can transmit herpes to your face. 

Gonorrhea, and chlamydia; two infections which can be tested for and treated easily. HIV, the risk is low because it's oral sex but the anus is higher risk because the mucous membrane is so delicate. Syphilis, another one you can test for and treat. Hepatitis A and Hepatitis B, these two you can get vaccinated for so if you come in contact with the viruses they won't harm you. Lastly gastrointestinal problems and parasites, salmonella, E Coli, basically the things that cause food poisoning might be hanging out and you don't want to put those in your body. 

Step 3: Set a time. I'm sure you don't want to go down on someone and find a dingleberry of poop and pubes stuck in your teeth. So if you're the one with the asshole watch your bowel movements. Healthy ones look like this, unhealthy ones look like this. Monitor what you eat so you're not sick or gaseous. Shower and wash your whole butt with soap. Especially the anus and all those little crevices that make it look like a star. Stay outside though, don't go inside. Then make sure to rinse off all the soap trim, shave, or wax your pubes if you choose and wash again. If you're the one with the mouth how about nothing spicy to eat that's going to burn the anus if you lick it directly, and for hygiene's sake clean your mouth.

Step 4: Acquire some dams for a layer of protection. They reduce the risk of all the bugs I mentioned earlier, and cover up the smell and taste of asshole. Here are three ways to make a quick dam that fits right between the cheeks. Condom, make sure it isn't expired, carefully remove the wrapper, unroll it about an inch, cut off the tip so it becomes a ring, then cut the ring open and unroll the condom into a dam. Glove, remove the pinkie ring and middle fingers then cut the glove open along the pinky side. Now you have a dam with fingers holes for the anus and/or vagina if there is one. And non microwavable cling-wrap. 

Step 5: With all preparation in place, play. With all sorts of body parts, kiss, massage whatever it takes to get all riled up before... Step 6: When you lightly blow on the asshole. The blowing will not only light up this sensitive spot it will waft the smell toward you so you can evaluate whether or not you want to proceed. If everything is a green light move on to...

Step 7: Add lube and put a dam in place. Add enough lube to keep things soft, but not so much so that the anus thinks it's leaking. I'm not opposed to saliva and direct mouth to anus contact but there are so many benefits to using a dam. This is strawberry flavored, but with any dam your mouth is feces free to explore other areas during and after anilingus.

Sexually transmitted infections are so much less of a worry, and your partner feeling self-conscious about their butthole being a butthole? That's all covered up. Win-win-win. 

Step 8: Don't literally eat ass. Unless your partner is into a poking feeling out of nowhere I recommend working your way to the anus, from the buttocks, from the genitals, to the perineum, inner thighs, and up. Kissing and touching with your hands, licking if you like. Spreading the cheeks and going straight in for asshole can feel quite jarring. I personally associate it with the pelvic exam, or a wedgie. You want to feel welcome there, and the best way to do that is by approaching with care. 

Once you're at the site think licking, gentle sucking, kissing, and tickling. Even making contact and not moving at all can be incredibly arousing. The anus is densely packed with nerve endings as part of a concentrated area of erogenous tissue, and it's slightly taboo, so there's a thrilling adventure and doing something pleasurable that society tells us not to.

Step 9: Check in. Come up for air and ask your partner questions. "More? Wetter? Deeper?" You can ask them open-ended questions like how is it but getting a yes or no answer means you're not caught up in conversation when they likely want your mouth getting back to business. 

Step 10: Enjoy yourself. Anilingus is hopefully pleasurable for everyone involved. If you're not into it consider 69ing so you're getting oral sex too, or any new position for that matter. We've done videos demonstrating these positions. They're linked below. It's okay for you to stop at any time and it's okay to let your partner know what you think about eating ass. "Turns out it's not my thing." "I'm super turned on now and would like it if you went down on me." 

Step 11: Wash your mouth and face afterward. Soap, water, soap water, mouthwash, brush your teeth, floss, mouthwash again, clean all the things. Step 12: then stay curious. Have the longer conversation about what it was like, whether or not you want to do it again in the future, and what could improve the experience. I'm confident that you and your partner will have some great solutions of your own on how to eat ass.

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