Hank: Hello and welcome to Games with Hank. Today on Games with Hank the Hank is going to be John Green.

John: Hi, I'm playing Hank today.

Hank: And the game is going to be Wreckfest, which is a really amazing car race simulator thing that-- you have to push okay, it's already, the game is already playing John.

John: By the way, let me just say that Games with Hank without Hank reminds me of HankGames without Hank - you used to have a game channel called HankGames and then I took took it over and you no longer play--

Hank: It's true, it's true so--

John: --and now it's just Games with Hank

Hank: --yeah, well I'm going to make sure that I'm here the whole time so that you don't take it

John: I'm going to start playing FIFA

John: The graphics, by the way, are amazing. Is it okay if I scream, because I'm listening my - the headphones are very loud. Can you make the headphones less loud?

Hank: Nope

John: Panic! 

Hank: That was not a good start.

John: That was an exceptionally poor start.

Hank: You're already smoking, this is terrible.

John: Is that bad? Should I not be smoking?

Hank: Part of the trick - wow, that guy cleared-cleared out right in front of you -

John: Well I'm very good at timing my figure eight

Hank: Part of the trick is-- to this, is not just getting in front of people but also like, having your car make it through the entire course. So--

John: Oh, you're concerned that I'm not going to make it to the end just 'cause I got a little smoke in my tires? 

Hank: That's not your tires.

John: Oh, that's just my tires, I got a little bit of a-- oh this is perfect-- No! 

Hank: Yes!

John: Everything worked out worse than expected. Well, that's not good for the team. I think we're going to go ahead and restart.

John:This video isn't ending until I win.

Hank: Oh wow, this is going to be a long video.

John: Nope, no it's not. What state am I from? Notre Dame? 

Hank: Does that say Notre Dame?

John: What does that say?

Hank: It says "Hot Damn" is what it says.

John: Sorry, what does it say again?

Hank: Hot Damn

John: Hot Damn!

Hank: It just says "Hot Damn"

John: Yeah, well that makes sense. That's a great state, by the way. They've got some weird senators. Hey Hank, how do we switch around so we can see how damaged this vehicle is? 

Hank: Uh, the right hand control stick. 

John: That one?

Hank: Oh no, that was just to change the camera angle.

John: Panic. That's bad. What are you doing to me, Hank?

Hank: Uh, no. This-- this one.

John: Oh yeah, there we go. Yeah no, thanks! Perfect buddy! Good timing.

John: Alright.

Hank: You are not going to do well.

John: Alright. Everybody, everybody calm down. It was going fine until you started messing around. 

Hank: You gotta remember that you're in a car that was made in 1970. There is no - like all of the things that your car has to make it easy to turn, this car does not have.

John: So it doesn't have anything?
Hank: No.

John: Do they have any updated cars? Could I--

Hank: Well, look at what you're doing, you're driving around with the intent-- 

John: Wooooo!

Hank: --of destroying the vehicle so if the-- 

John: Wooooo! I'm not trying to destroy the vehicle I'm trying to win the race! Wooooo! That's the noise I make. I think I got a little bit of smoke in the tires.

Hank: No smokes.

Both: Nooo!

John: I'm fine.

Hank: You're fine.

John: Those can keep coming, I'm fine. I'm fine.

Hank: Oh, they keep piling on top. Hit start and you can-- 

John: No.

Hank: --reset car-- 

John: I don't-- oh, I can reset car.

Hank: You're still in the race, but you're not-- oh, you no longer have a front right tire.

John: Who needs one of those? Why are you messing with my--

Hank: I just--

John: I have enough damage without you screwing ar-- boy it's really hard to turn the way I want to turn without my tire. I can do it!

Hank: I don't think you can do it

John: I can do it! I'm gonna win!

Hank: I don't think you can do it. Things were going so well. 

John: Come on.

Hank: They were going really well, John. 

John: Somebody take me out of the race, please, I can't live with the indignity of just being stuck off here in a corner with three wheels.

Hank: Oh God.

John: Somebody come over and-- 

Hank: You can't go at all?

John: --put me out of my misery. No. Yeah! Kinda. Yeaaah! I'm-- somebody kill me! Is this a good spot to get killed?

Hank: Yeah, I think you could probably get killed there.

John: Come on! For the la--

Hank: There you go!

John: Yaaaay!

Hank: We got some serious, serious car to restart. You gonna restart?

John: Everybody focus, focus!

John: This is going to be the longest Games with Hank video to date. But also the most-- ooh, that was a poor start. Alright, this is going to be a four hour long Hank Games video. Just me, playing this game over and over again until I win.

Hank: Now I get to just whisper in your ear--

John: Don't whisper.

Hank: --about how bad you're doing.

John: Don't whisper. And I'm not that-- am I that bad? Am I worse than you -

Hank: You're pretty bad.

John: --am I worse than you were--

Hank: You are definitely worse than me.

John: --at this point in your playing career?

Hank: Oh, no no. I've spent some time. I'm not good at this game. 

John: But you, but you've won?

Hank: Yeah! I have won-- 

John: You've won the figure eight track

Hank: --the figure eight one.

John: Woooo! I can't resist the urge to hit someone, it's great.

Hank: Actually, I think the figure eight is the only race I've won. The others are more skill based.

John: And this one is just-- 

Hank: Whereas this one is just, well don't--

John: If you bring enough brute force to not get hit in the figure eight.

Hank: Oooh, yeah, you gotta not get hit in the figure eight.

John: You gotta not do that, that's one of the keys.

Hank: Well, you got, you got pushed out of it and built up some nice speed. You're eight of twenty-four.

John: I know. What I really have to root for is that all of these guys die.

Hank: Well, not all of them.

John: Frick burger!

Hank: Frick burger is right. That was really unfortunate, but at the same time, you managed to-- oh, never mind

John: Do not speak too soon, sir!

Hank: Wow, you're going fast though. You're being driven entirely by the force of the people who have crashed into you. Your car does not look good.

John: I've got four wheels!

Hank: You do have four wheels. 

John: I'm killing it. What lap am I on, four? Four tenths of the way there, ladies and gentlemen. Forty percent done. I'm in ninth. I've got a chance to win this race. It's a very slim chance. But you know.

Hank: Yeah, if you all work together, don't get into any more crashes at all.

John: Miracles happen. And some guy just went out of the race. Ooooh! That hurt. That stings!

Hank: Slow down a little more. 

John: I'm fine.

Hank: Okay, you're playing.

John: I'm fine. 

Hank: No you aren't.

John: Oh, I spoke too soon.

John: I need to be a little bit less aggressive with the uh, and use the brake more.

Hank: Yeah, yeah, uh huh. You don't need to work yourself up too hard at the beginning, your goal is to-- you don't need to shoot up ahead of all these people. You just need to--

John: I just need to stick with them.

Hank: Yeah. Stick with them, don't let them push you into walls. Be aggressive enough that you're pushing back, but not that you're spinning out on turns, which is what gets you-- 

John: Okay. Ohhh. That couldn't have gone worse!

Hank: That was bad luck.

John: Well, but you know what, on the other hand, it cleared some things up for me, because it allows me-- 

Hank: Oh, there's a huge pileup over there

John: --it allows me to spend the next few laps like a little bit behind the pack. I actually like where I am right now. Less now, less--

Hank: That was good-- 

John: --less now than I did before. Oh no! Panic! Panic! Fix it Hank!

Hank: I don't know why you're pushing to change the camera view but, stop doing it.

John: I don't either, believe me I don't wanna be. No, that's, that's--

Hank: Just against the wall-- wow, that's a big pileup.

John: There's a lot going on--

Hank: That's a big pileup. I'm impressed by my computer's ability to continue rendering this. Woah, goodness me!

John: Perfect.

Hank: How do all these other people make it through there?

John: Perfect. Not my best work, that's where I needed to use my brake. 

Hank: Yeah, try and avoid that.

John: Or can I just--

Hank: Take it tight, take it on the inside lane. There, you just watch them take themselves out. And then blow that guy's front off completely.

John: It also wasn't particularly good for my front.

Both: Woah!

John: Slow down, cowboy!

Hank: Stop with the fighting, stop with the fighting! We're friends. Oh, crap!

John: What?

Hank: I don't know

John: What?

Hank: The record stopped.