Good morning, Hank, it's Wednesday. As you can tell from the grey speckled wall behind me, I'm in an airport. I also had a colonoscopy yesterday, and for lack of a better word, I'm still feeling kind of crappy.

So, good news, people who haven't yet read the first six chapters of The Great Gatsby. You have an extension until Monday.

Okay, hold on, I gotta get on a plane.

And now I'm at Hogwarts.

Hank, there are a lot of Nerdfighters downstairs at LeakyCon 2011 right now, and I feel kind of bad because they all want to take pictures and I wanna take pictures, too, but I have this crippling social anxiety disorder that makes it impossible for me to do that kind of thing or to hug strangers or whatever and I feel just....bah, I feel guilty.

In other news, Hank, you know that album you've been working for a year and a half, Ellen Hardcastle, which you named after a Nerdfighter who won a Project for Awesome raffle? Anyways, Hank, I don't know when it comes out, but I'm really excited.

Hank: Well, it comes out today.

John: Hank?!

Hank: Hi.

John: Ah, it's Hank!

So Ellen Hardcastle is out today.

Hank: Yes. It is. It's available now and I've got like a box of them downstairs that I have not looked at yet.

John: Congratulations. It has awesome cover art which you're looking at now instead of Hank's face, sorry, Hank's face. So yesterday we were talking about how, you know, I'm signing every pre-ordered copy of The Fault in Our Stars.

Hank: And I thought that wasn't enough. So I've decided that, instead of doing that, for Ellen Hardcastle, I'm going to let you say whatever you want me to say in a video.

John: You are such a brother! Like--

Hank: Every, every

John: I have a good idea, and then you have to have a better idea.

Hank: Every person who buys a physical copy of Ellen Hardcastle, you are going to be able to send me a 10 word script for a video and I'm going to film that video and then put it onto YouTube.

John: It's unfair!

(Arguing)

Hank: I'm going to make thousands of ten-word videos.

John: I was doing such, urgh...

Hank: There, there are rules. It cannot be profane, it has to be in English, and it has to make sense.

John: Oh look what those people are doing is something I'd never do. So if you want your own Vlogbrothers video with Hank Green saying ten words of your choosing, as long as they're not profane and they make sense, you can just buy a copy of Ellen Hardcastle and then you'll get an email with instructions about how to proceed.

Hank: dft.ba/ellenhardcastle, or possibly not. Because I think it may be dft.ba/hardcastle. I don't know.

John: How awesome is it that you named that album after a nerdfighter who donated to the project for awesome and her name happened to be Ellen Hardcastle? Anything else?

Hank: There are good songs on Ellen Hardcastle.

John: Oh, right, the music. Yeah, it's good. It's good. It has such hits as (Phineas Gage) and Strange Charm, the best song ever written about quarks. Admittedly low-bar, but it exceeds it by a lot.

Other hits include Shake-a-booty, which you probably haven't heard yet, but it's one of my favorite songs ever.

Hank: And there's lots of songs that you haven't heard and there's other song... Katherine, what are the other songs?

John: We had Katherine hiding in the bathroom.

Katherine: The Fermi Paradox.

Hank: Fermi Paradox.

John: Fermi Paradox. The best song ever written about the Fermi Paradox. It's true.

Hank: It's true. It's totally, no I completely agree.

John: I mean, you dominate, you know, little-known scientific phenomena, songs about.

Hank: I want that to be on my next Hank Green t-shirt.

John: Hank Green, dominating little-known scientific phenomena, comma, songs about.

Hank: I have to go to rehearsal now.

John: DFTBA! Hank, I will see you as soon as I turn off this video.

Hank (singing): A quark is a fundamental constituent of matter, observed in 1968 through deep elastic scatter. And we found that protons aren't as simple as we thought. We thought that they were solid particles but, they are not. Protons in fact are made of up three separate pieces. It just gets more confusing as our knowledge increases. But that is what a quark, it's a piece of a proton. And they also make up other things including the neutron. Oh, up down strange charm, top bottom, if you don't know what a quark is it don't matter you still gott'em. And with leptons, and boson, unless something's amiss, they make up everything that we can see and that we know exists.