Good morning, Hank. It's Tuesday, and in a stunning turn of events I find myself... in an airport.  
 
Wardrobe change! Hank, today's video comes to you in four very special parts.  Part one: your tour!  
 
Hank, your tour seems to be going well.  I wish I was there, but you know what?  I-I can't sing or play an instrument, so I would be kind of irrelevant.  Reviews of your tour so far include that it was "so fun," that people had "the best time ever,"  and that you are a "surprisingly competent musician."  Which analysis I have to say I agree with, Hank.  I mean back in 2007 when you released your love song for Helen Hunt,  I had no idea that you could even play the guitar- let alone write and sing.  And watching that video my main feeling wasn't like "oh this is a great song" or anything, although it was, it was "when did Hank get a guitar?"  So, yeah, Nerdfighters, if you're in any of these cities, go to Hank's tour.
 
Part two: Batman's Just a Rich Guy With an Affinity for Bats. 
 
So Hank, when I showed our two competing shirt designs to Sarah, she laughed for like eight minutes and then finally said "Why would anyone buy a shirt that says "Batman's just a rich guy with an affinity for bats"?"  So, yeah.  If I can't even convert my wife, I'm concerned about my ability to win this contest.  But both these shirts are available for pre-order until April, 25th and then they will never be available again.... I mean unless they are for some reason.  I don't know.  The future is unpredictable.  
 
Part three: Why We're in the Airport.
 
So, Hank, Sarah and I are on our way to attend gala (gay-la) or possibly a gala (gah-la).  Hold on. According to the dictionary, both are acceptable.  It's like GIF and JIFF.  So, we're going to a gala (gay-la) gala (gah-la)- the word so fancy, they named it twice.  This gala (gay-la) gala (gah-la) is to celebrate the Time 100, Time magazine's list of the 100 most important people in the world.  Hank, you might remember that ridiculously last year, I-I was on that list.  This year I have apparently declined in importance, so didn't make the list, but I did snag an invite to the party!  I can't tell you how excited I am to have declined in significance, Hank.  Long may it continue.  This could save me the embarrassment of having to explain to other members of the Time 100 exactly why I was on the list- which happened a lot at last year's gala (gay-la) gala (gah-la).  Rand Paul, or whatever, would be like "Who are you exactly?" and I would be like "Oh, I'm the guy who popularized the phrase French the Llama" and he would be like "Yeah, that's not a thing."  This year, I don't have to do any of that stuff.  When people ask who I am, I'll just be like "I'm Rand Paul's date."  
 
Part four: Strange Marriages
 
Hank, your airport video about strange marriages reminded me of a strange marriage I just heard about... or at least a strange engagement. So, many years ago, Hank, in 2008 the first Nerdfighter gathering in Europe that I attended happened in Amsterdam. There were like 30 or 40 Nerdfighters there and it was just kinda like a party! And after it had been going on for about an hour a Dutch Nerdfighter I knew from her video series, "Best Wishes from The Netherlands", came up to me and she was like: "Can you introduce us to the Belgian boys they have cute accents?" And now 7 years later one of those Dutch girls- now woman- is marrying one of those Belgian boys-now man! So congratulations to them... I love it when Nerdfighter-like turns into Nerdfighter-love. So Hank the weirdest part is that at any one of your concerts in the next couple of weeks like Nerdfighters could meet and fall in love and 7 years later get engaged! 
 
Okay they just called my name for final boarding call, I, uhh, oh boy. I've got like, my tux shoes and my backpack and everything is totally disorganized. I hope I make it to the plane, I hope I make it to the plane..... MADE IT. 
 
Hank, I'll see you on Friday.