Hank: Hello! And welcome to Dear Hank and John.

Brennan: Or as I like to call it - Dear Brennan and Hank.

Hank: It's a podcast where two brothers - and sometimes one brother and a friend - answer your questions, give you dubious advice, and bring you all the week's news from both Mars and AFC Wimbledon. Today we are joined by Brennan Lee Mulligan, and I have to say, I was-I like- I like Dungeons and Dragons very much. I was once playing DnD, and I asked my DM about darkvision, and he said that I could see sixty feet in the dark, but I was confused. I would like to see sixty feet in the dark, but there's nowhere near thirty people.

Brennan: [Pause then laughter] Oh! Oh the joy! A straight up-a straight up joke. A true joke. Just a capital J Joke. We love it.

Hank: [Laughter] Di-did you expect it? Did you know where I was going?

Brennan: Not-not even at all. That would be- that would be an alarming thing. Seeing sixty feet in the dark is very upsetting. Also because the original description of darkvision is that everything is kind of in a grainy black and white. It's sort of like you're in Daredevil's-

Hank: Scary mystery feet

Brennan: Scary mystery feet? Ooh no thank you. Um-

Hank: You see sixty feet in the dark, and I'm like, "do I have to kill all of them?"

Brennan: [Laughter]

Hank: Are they- do they have eyes? Can I do an arcana check on this? What's happening?

Brennan: It does the good horror thing too, of if I tell you you see sixty feet, it immediately makes you have a psychological lurch forward. Because I didn't tell you you saw sixty people - or - thirty people. So, you know what I mean? So you have to suddenly go, like, "Wait. But, I see feet. Do they-are they attached to ankles? Can I see shins?" [through laughter] Wha- Wait-

Hank: I mean it seems like- I would rather fight sixty feet than thirty people. Like that's true.

Brennan: Yes.

Hank: Cause, what can a foot do to me?