Tom: Why am I sat like this?

Lindsey: 'Cause we're- we're gonna do sex talk, that's why.

T: Hey you, my name is Thomas 'Tomska' Ridgewell and welcome back to content? (ribbit) I'm here with Doctor Lindsey Doe, a clinical sexologist and operator of the brilliant channel, Sexplanations, which is a channel that I've consumed a lot of. And now I know what my pee-pee do. Uh- So please go to her channel if you need to know anything sex related. You're the expert literally and literally.

L: I love your videos, boop boop boop, wherever they are. They're so good.

T: Thank you. Do you think you can just make videos appear? That doesn't- you don't have that power.

L: Yeah, thumbnail. Boop, boop, boop.

T: You know all the terms.

L: Not all of them.

T: You don't know all of them?

L: I hope you're gonna teach me some actually. Do you know frubble?

T: Okay, so we're gonna get to this. I'm assuming you know a lot more slang and technical terms for sex things, for actions, for body parts, for their functions. And I wanna play a game where you tell me them, and I have to figure out what they are. And if I get it even kinda right, I get a point. I mean I don't get a point, there's no points.

L: Scoreboard? 

T: Yup, some points. This is a stupid idea, but I just really wanted an excuse to hear some funny words, um from an expert. (ribbit) What was the first one? 

L: Frubble.

T: Frebble.

L: Frubble.

T: Like?

L: I have a cold. Frubble.

T: Frebble. Frubble.

L: In the UK it's frubble. F-R-U-B-B-L-E. And in the United States, its compersion.

T: Oooo, okay is it a body part, a bodily function, or a sex act? These are the three categories.

L: Hmmm, it's an experience.

T: It's an experience? Is it like- It's making me think of like compounding. Is it like when someone sits on your chest? Is it cake sitting? What is it? Doctor Doe, what is-

L: This is the best. What is cake sitting? 

T: Oh, well I mean, the name is what- They sit on the cake. 

L: Oh, okay.

T: And that's like a thing- That's like a fetish people-

T: And then there's cake farts which is that, but they fart on the cake.

L: Okay, frubble is when you experience positive feelings when someone you care about is experiencing pleasure.

T: Oh so like arousal from seeing them aroused.

L: Yeah. The opposite of jealousy.

T: So is this- is this the basis of like cuckholdery?

L: Not necessarily because you're not getting off from like the pain of it-

T: Oh, okay. 

L: the shame of it. You're getting off from the enjoyment of it.

T: Aw that's sweet.

L: Yeah. (rib-bit) Want another word?

T: Yeah I want another word! 

L: Um, how about-

T: Get out of here frog.

L: Epididymal hypertension.

T: Hypertension. Now that's a term I do know. So is it just really tight vagina?

L: Epididymal as in epididymus, which is the tubing that comes out of your testicles.

T: Would this be like if your balls are getting- blue balls.

L: Yes!

T: Blue balls! 

L: Look one point!

T: Technical term for a thing that people claim doesn't exist, but totally does. You made a video about it, didn't you?

L: I totally did. 

T: Yeah, and I was thrilled that you made that video because I've seen a lot of other people on the internet argue like "no it's this- intrinsic element of rape culture where it's like guys lying and saying that this is a thing that happens to just get more sex". And it's like no no, it really does. It's a real thing.

L: Yeah.

T: Yeah, I mean if people are using for that ends, then bad, bad people. But totally real.

L: Yeah.

T: Have experienced, would not recommend.

L: Having experience, would not recommend. I don't have balls. But it happens like in my clitoris and my vagina. Pink walls, they call it. 

T: Pink- oh I heard, I thought it was pink ovaries was the name.

L: Or pink ovaries.

T: Yeah, that one I did know.

L: So it's just like arrrrg!

T: I wanted- I wanted some dick! um (rib-bit)

L: Tribadism. 

T: Tribadism. So is this tri- as in three?

L: No.

T: Oh.

L: Do you want me to do a visual? Enactment?

T: I don't, but please do. I don't wanna see it but I do. Like there's the time you did a video where you- is this what people would call scissoring?

L: Yeah!

T: That's a- is that a real thing?

T: That seems like, really confusing.

L: Yeah.

T: -at some point a couple lesbians were like "hey do you wanna tripidim?"

L: Trib

T: Do you wanna tri-

L: Tribbing.

T: Tribbing. You wanna trib? Let's get (rib-bit) tribbed. Oh mate I went out with this fit bird, she tribbed the (rib-bit) me out last night. (rib-bit)

L: Docking.

T: Docking. The penis, the- when you put the two, like the penis in the foreskin of like, someone else's-

L: Yeah.

T: Like you make them- make the two foreskins kiss.

L: Yeah. This is my penis and that's your penis. Well yeah, and then your penis foreskin comes over my or- oh like this. 

T: Great. Thank you. I've always heard of that, it's like I'm glad that someone made a word for it, but I can't imagine anyone ever doing it.

L: Mhm.

T: Why would you do it? Like even if-

L: It's (?~4:43) um finger cuffs, where you put your fingers in and then you m m m

T: OH.

L: Or you would use your foreskin to jack someone else off. 

T: How- That is genius. Hands- Hats off for innovation. (rib-bit)

L: Soaking.

T: Soaking. Oh.

L: I don't know if you have that one here. It's religiously affiliated.

T: I got nothing. I can't-

L: It's when you're avoiding having sex because you want to save it until marriage, and so you just put the penis into an orifice, like the vagina, and you just set it there. It soaks. And it "doesn't count". 

T: It does. It does.

L: Yeah. It does. You have to protect yourself against sexually transmitted infections, you could possibly get someone pregnant, and you are definitely having sex.

T: Sex. Yeah that one 100 percent, like "oh only one thrust doesn't count". What exact number does count? That's a really grim term. Like just to imagine, like you might as well call it stewing.

L: No.

T: That's all- No, I'm gonna call it stewing from now on. Yeah that's the British term.

L: Soaking is better than stewing.

T: Hashtag official terminology. (rib-bit)

L: pedomentia.

T: Oh, I guess we'd call it pee-domentia here.

L: But it's ped like-

T: Oh ped. How the hell can you tell the difference in America?

L: Yeah that's a good question.

T: Is that just like you're just like well into feet?

T: You've just got a foot fetish. Uh, is it that you want to be stepped on?

L: ["no" sound]

T: Is it the belief that you have to bind feet?

L: No.

T: Is it the uh-

L: I like your guessing, but I just want to save you and tell you the answer. 

T: No! That's the fun part! Pedomentia. 

L: I think the mentia is the belief part and the foot is the ped part. So you just put-

T: So you believe in feet!

L: So something about feet that has to do with sex.

T: They are divine? They are sacred and sexual? Is this a Mormon thing?

L: What's like the foot belief?

T: There's a foot belief?? Is the belief that they're sexy? I don't want it to be anything else.

L: If I said 'what size are you're feet?' 

T: Oh! The assumption that there's a correlation between foot size and penis size. Is there?

L: I don't know. 

T: Oh. Why does no one know the answer to this? How is it such a commonplace-

L: I know. 

[ribbit]

L: Cunnilingus. 

T: Yup. I know that one. That's, uh, that's when you outsmart someone else in bed. When like you talk and you're smarter than them. So you have like cunning linguistics. Yeah.

L: Yeah, yeah. You talk. With your mouth. On someone's genitals.

T: Yeah.

[ribbit]

L: I don't know how to pronounce this next one.

T: Oh!

L: 'Cause it's German.

T: Okay.

L: I'm gonna try. Mittelschmerz.

T: Oh, Meetershmerz. 

L: Mittelschmerz

T: Mittelschmerz. If it's Germany, then it's not gonna be based in Latin origins so it's very hard to figure out the, um, etymology of it. Uh-

L: I like that that's your tactic, that you have a strategy for all of this. 

T: Come on Gunter, let's go and have a mittelschmerz. Okay Hans. I've got nothing. I cannot possibly even begin to figure that out. 

L: It translates "middle pain", or I don't know if it translates middle pain but it means middle pain. And it's what happens around ovulation, when the egg is getting ready to come out. And it hurts. 

T: It hoits. 

L: Nobody talks about that. They talk about the pain from cramps, PMS, and all that. But they don't talk about ovulation pain.

T: Right?

L: Mm-hm

T: Great.

L: Who has the bigger, scoopier bellend? Or corona?

T: No!

[ribbit]

L: Amychesis. I don't know if I'm pronouncing it correctly.

T: Amy- Omni?

L: Amy-chesis. 

T: A porn star. 

L: No. If I do porn, that's what I'll go by.

T: Great. Amy Chesis. Um, although that just makes me think of cheese, and then I'm like eh. Amychesis, um amy- emma- amychesis. It's sounds like a natural process. And now the subject is going through amychesis and is turning into a beautiful flower. I don't know. I give up. I don't know what-

L: It's when you scratch during sex.

T: Oh, it has a technical name.

L: Yeah. When you're like "oh", yeah that scratching is-

T: Wow, it's amazing that there's a name for everything. I mean it's not surprising, but did that even need a name? Wasn't scratching fine?

L: I like that it has a name.

[ribbit]

L: Muffing.

T: Muffing! Is that when you like- oh that's when you smush your face into a vagina and scream. *screams* It's muffing time! Yes! Okay, what's muffing?

L: It's when you, um, put things into the inguinal canal.

T: What's that?

L: In bodies that have testicles, the testicles descended into the scrotum. But before that, they were up in the abdomen, the inguinal canal. And so you can use those canals to like either put the testicles back in or finger them or fuck them. So someone who is a size-

T: So it's like the eye sockets for your balls.

L: Yeah. It's a form of trans sex.

T: Yeah, okay that makes sense.

L: Yeah.

T: It's muffing time!

[ribbit]

T: Boy howdy, have we learned a lot today! Knowledge was exchanged. It's like I am sex positive, but I think when I'm in my office describing sex words I'm inherently, it's inherently like-

L: We're having fun!

T: We are having fun! And sex is fun! Tell your friends, don't, what? How do I- What would you say to the youth of tomorrow today?

L: Stay curious.

T: Stay curious. Go check out sexplanations and look at the things. You've got a question about sex? Just type them words into the channel and maybe Doctor Doe has made a video about it. Maybe she hasn't. Maybe she needs to get her act together. I'll never know. Bye and thank you and bye! And thank you and bye!

L: Bye!

[outro]