(In Emma's Office)
[Emma]: When I take someone on as a new client I feel it's important to involve myself in all aspects of their lives. And so far Harriet has been a model client; she's dressing better, she's presenting herself more confidently and I even heard her say "hell yes!" to herself in the bathroom mirror. 

So it is with this in mind that I was hoping that I could have blown the whole Martin thing out of proportion. And, it is with this in mind that I spent some time yesterday going over the feed of Harriet at her desk. She's practically forgotten the camera is there now, so I can observe her being completely natural. Well, natural for her. But sadly I wasn't wrong, as you will see my first instinct was right. As it ALWAYS is. (wink)

[Intro Music Plays]

(At Harriet's office) 
[Martin]:   Harriet?
[Harriet]:  Oh thank god! I don't know what I did, the spinny thing just keeps spinning and it won't stop.
(Martin takes a sit next to Harriet)
[Martin]:   Yeah, we call that the spinning beach ball of death. (laughs)
[Harriet]:   My mum warned me to back up all my files because Mercury is in retrograde. Why didn't I listen?
[Martin]: No, don't worry I'll fix you right up. Umm... the computer I mean, not you. Your in good shape. (embarrassed chuckle) I meant that figuratively and not um you know... figuratively.
[Harriet]:  It's okay. I understood. 
[Martin]: Good. So, uh let's talk a look. Oh wow, you got a lot of apps running.
[Harriet]:  I do?
[Martin]:  Yeah, see all the windows you have open here? Hmm "improve your life and flaunt your best features." 
[Harriet]: OH MY GOD. 
[Harriet and Martin]: Ooo Sorry! 
[Martin]: I shouldn't have being reading your screen.
[Harriet]: Its okay. Its research for a blog list that Emma's doing.
[Martin]: Oh, good. I mean, good work. I mean, well you obviously don't need to learn how to flaunt... stuff. Let's fix your computer.
[Harriet]: Okay. 
[Martin]: Hmm ahh I think it has to do with your memory.
[Harriet]: (startled look) It can't be? What did I forget?
[Martin]: What?
[Harriet]: What did I forget? I have everything written down. 
[Martin]: (chuckles) Uh no, that's that's not what I meant. It's your computer's processing memory. It's overloaded. I just need to install some extra memory sticks. Then you'll be in business.
[Harriet]: Processing memory. Is that like RAM?
[Martin]: Yes. Wow. Most people don't want to know about computers; they just want it fixed.
[Harriet]: Oh, I like to know things. 
[Martin]: Well I'd love to teach you about computers, if you want to learn.
[Harriet]: Sure! Pretty soon I'll be able to fix my own computer.
[Martin]: Oh no! Don't do that!
[Harriet]: Why?
[Awkward silence]
[Martin]: Uh, well because then what excuse will I have to come see you? (both look happy and embarrassed) So I'll go get those memory sticks.
[Harriet]: That would be great. 
[Martin]: Don't have too many apps open at once. Till I come back. 
(Harriet nods)
[Harriet]: Can't wait.
[Martin:] Me too. 
(Smile awkwardly at each other and Martin leaves happily)

(Back to Emma's office)
[Emma]: Do you see? That can't happen! Harriet and B-mart may look cute together but cuteness does not a power couple make. There are so many factors to consider... personality, lifestyle, career and ambition! 

Right now Harriet doesn't realize what else is out there. With so much potential ahead of her the last thing she should do is settle. The choice that is right in front of her is not the one that's best for her. She may not see it now, but I will widen her horizons. It is time to play the role that only great life coaches and matchmakers have to play, the role of, to put it in PG terms, the rooster obstacle.

So far the past day and a half I've made sure that Harriet has been too busy for computer repair lessons. Instead, she's been "researching" to help find my next high profile client. In researching all these amazing candidates "for me", Harriet will have to realize how many amazing single men are out there for her. Please, don't call me a genius. But you can if you want to.

(Emma ringing Harriet)
[Emma]: Harriet come in here, and give me an update. 
(Harriet walks in)

[Harriet]: Hi Emma!

[Emma]: What do you have so far?

[Harriet]: Well I never realized how many eligible bachelors were out there before. And I think they can all use your help. 

(Emma winks) [Emma]: Who's first?

[Harriet]: Xander Archibald the Third, world class yacht racer and polo champion. And he owns an island! 

[Emma]: Interesting! Island is kind of small. But he has nice eyes.

[Harriet]: Oh you know who has nice eyes? Martin. He says their hazel but their really green and blue with little specs of yellow.

[Emma]: Who's next!?

[Harriet]: Umm, Dylan Young, drummer of the grunge band The Thrashing Thorns. He says in this article that he's ready to settle down and stop singing with groupies. 

[Emma]: With all that ink he's kind of cute. 

[Harriet]: If you say so. I'm not really a tattoo person. Martin doesn't have any, we were talking the other day...

[Emma]: What else have you got?  

[Harriet]: James Elton.

[Emma]: The State Senator?

[Harriet]: Yes! California's youngest ever. And he went to Princeton. 

[Emma]: Young, yet distinguished! How is he single?

[Harriet]: Ahh, he was dating his campaign manager, until she dumped him to go work for his opponent!

[Emma]: Poor thing. He is too adorable to go through so much hardship.

[Harriet]: That's what I thought! 

[Emma]: Alright. So what's your opinion? 

[Harriet]: You want MY opinion? 

[Emma]: Yes, Harriet! Your opinion matters to me. Who do you like best?

[Harriet]: Oh, I don't know. 

[Emma]: Well, pretend your going on a date, but you can only be set up with one of these three. Who would you pick? Hypothetically?

[Harriet]: Um, well, I guess I would go with, Senator Elton?

[Emma]: Excellent choice, Harriet! 

[Harriet]: Really?

[Emma]: Yeah. Let's track him down. 

[Harriet]: You don't want to hear about all the others I found?

[Emma]: I trust your instincts. So we're gonna get him. For you and for us. Find contact information for me stat. 

[Harriet]: Of course, right away. 
(Harriet leaves the room) 

[Emma]: (to camera) And so it begins.

(Outro music plays)