Lizzie: So allow me to sum up recent events. Charlotte left town to take a job with Ricky Collins, then Wickham came to town, then Bing, Caroline, and Darcy left town, then Wickham and Jane left town, although... not together. And so here I am... still in town... Still don't have a job... Still living with my parents.

My name is Lizzie Bennet and why is everyone moving on but me?

[intro plays]

Lizzie: So I guess it's nice to have a break from the emotional turmoil of the last month or so.

[enter Lydia]

Lydia: It is okay, Lizzie. I have spent my entire life preparing for this moment. [hands her chocolate and tissues and hugs her]
I know Jane is your go to sister, but heart breaking recovery is my specialty. Plus I am way better at plotting revenge than her.

Lizzie: Revenge? Why do I need to plot revenge?

Lydia: What are you? Forty? This has been on Twitter for the last ten minutes. [shows Lizzie her phone]

Lizzie: Oh, George made it to Meryton. [Lydia pointedly looks at her] What?

Lydia: What? Look at his tweets. [pointing at the phone]

Lizzie: 'Makin' a splash in Meryton' 'Hanging with the Meryton Marines... feelin' very welcome at this end of the pool ;)' He lost his ability to use a g at the end of a present participle? 

Lydia: He is clearly in Meryton with other girls! Swimmer girls!

Lizzie: And?

Lydia: And you're okay with that?

Lizzie: The difference, dear sister, with George leaving town and Bing leaving town is that George and I were never exclusive. We were just... dating... casual. 

Lydia: Casual? Lizzie Bennet does not do casual.

Lizzie: Yeah, okay I... liked him, but um... he kept disappearing at odd times, a girl can take a hint. I mean come on, he started flirting with you in my bedroom when I left you alone for two seconds. I don't think George knows the meaning of the word serious. 

Lydia: But you don't... You weren't... How do you?

Lizzie: I edit my own videos now remember? That involves watching them.

Lydia: Gotta go. 

[Lydia exits]

[Lizzie starts eating a giant chocolate bar]

Lizzie: Mmm... Oh, Lydia. It was really sweet of her to try to come cheer me up. We do not tap the strategic chocolate reserve in this household lightly. I think I honestly am fine about the whole George thing, though. I'm not just saying that for the camera.
There is no weeping in these little jump cuts. [pretends to start crying] Why? [more fake crying]
None of that. Is that weird? Should I be more bothered by a guy who I was dating, talking about partying with other girls on Twitter?
Nope... still cool.

[phone rings]

[Lizzie looks at it for a moment before answering]

Lizzie: Hey, Charlotte... Oh, you saw. Yeah, um... No Jane's okay. I mean, she's not okay, but um, she'll be down there soon enough... Oh, sh-she's staying with our aunt... Yeah... um... Well...[starts tearing up] I know... um... Me too... um... Hang on a second. [turns off the camera]

[a few seconds of black]

Lizzie: Okay, universe, I can take a hint... Hey, Lydia are you lurking out there!

[enter Lydia]

Lydia: I do not lurk.

Lizzie: You do so.

Lydia: My room is right across the hall. Your voice carries.

Lizzie: Whatever. What to go to the music festival with me? 

[Lydia looks confused]

Lydia: Why?

Lizzie: Can't I just do something nice for my baby sister? Besides, I'm leaving town.

Lydia: You're leaving too!

Lizzie: Just for a little while.

Lydia: Where ya going? Meryton by any chance? [winks]

Lizzie: No! Charlotte invited me to go visit her before school starts, and I'm gonna go do it. 

Lydia: But I thought you were mad at Charlotte?

Lizzie: Well, maybe it's time for me to move on. 

Lydia: While you're gone can I run your video blogs!?

Lizzie: Make your own videos!

Lydia: I just might! [air kiss]

[Lydia exits]

Lizzie: Just like old times. See you soon Charlotte.

[outro plays]