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Uploaded:2015-06-02
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In which John continues this whole 15/16 thing by taking you on a walk in the woods and sharing 16 things he loves about being outside.



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Good morning Hank, it's Tuesday. So you made a fifteen part video that I responded to with a sixteen part video because I thought your video had sixteen parts. And then you made another fifteen part video. So here are sixteen things I love about being outside.

Now Hank, as you know I am a long time opponent of outside. Our ancestors made extraordinary sacrifices for millennia to create inside. And then we just dishonor all of that work by willfully going outside. But that noted, there is a lot I like about being outside.

Beginning with the irregularly shaped polygons that the sky forms through the trees. I love daddy long legs. How is a creature like you even real? This honeysuckle tree is invasive and horrible but I love the way it bends toward the light. I love the mighty White River here in Indianapolis. So Hank, Indianapolis was created by politicians who wanted to put the capitol city of Indiana in the geographical middle of Indiana. And they were like "Oh that place looks good it's on the banks of the mighty White River.

And that was important in the early nineteenth century, you had to be on some kind of navigable waterway to like, get stuff to your town. But it turns out, that in many places the White River is like six inches deep, which is how Indianapolis came to be the largest American city not on a navigable waterway!

I love geese and their little goslings, I also love Ryan Gosling but that's a different video. I love that downy woodpecker that's in there somewhere. I love turtles. Bye turtle! Sorry if I scared you.

I love flowers. Contemporary flowers are like a collaboration among humans and plants and bees. Boy, Hank do we need to collaborate better with plants and bees.

I love bubbles and they're just not the same inside. I love peeing outside. For the record I'm not doing it right now. I'm just saying I love that feeling, it's like "I too am an animal!" I love like weird swamps that feel undiscovered, they make me feel like an explorer. I love snails.

Also, while I have great admiration for the hardworking chemistry majors in the artificial smell business, there's nothing quite like the actual smell of outside.

I know I'm starting to sound like the nature enthusiasts I've always reviled but these leaves just smell so good! I just got a mosquito bite on my cheek and now I probably have West Nile virus so thanks mosquitoes, for reminding me what I don't love about outside.

I love how like when I'm looking for coyotes and great blue herons and all that kind of stuff sometimes I'll just see Henry and he'll be like "Dad, Dad, Dad, look at this moss!!" He and Alice always remind me that with the right level of attentiveness, everything is amazing. I love tiny little trees.

The forest is big and mostly without light and you probably won't make it, tiny little tree, but I wish you luck! I love trees that lean out over the water. They're doomed but they keep going.

I guess most of what I like about nature Hank, is its ability to go on, no matter what. I find that quite inspirational. I'll see you on Friday. (bumps into something) Oh. Gah, ruined a perfectly good outro, this guy. Stupid nature always tripping me.