Good morning Hank, it's Friday, January 8, 2010.

Last night our ancestral homeland returned to its rightful place among the states. Alabama may be 48th in education, but we are first in football played by people enrolled at educational institutions. YES!

Hank, I want to take a moment to thank the Yeti for heroically not going into labor during the game last night. Although now I kinda hope she does go into labor before next Wednesday so I don't have to get on the Frog Hopper until after my paternity leave. I don't wanna get on the Frog Hopper.

It's scary! Hank, today I wanna talk about Gus, who is a bug; but first I have to congratulate you on spending 15 hours in Target without going insane or getting arrested - a feat that is hardly ever even accomplished by Target employees. However Hank, having watched you do this, I feel compelled to point you to a 2008 study about hand dryers (link in the sidebar).

That study shows that using a hand-dryer after you wash your hands leads to you having way more bacteria on your hands than if you just don't wash them at all. However, that study didn't have anything to say about pumping that disgusting air directly into your mouth, so I'm sure you'll be fine. But just know that if you happen to get esophageal herpes, that's why.

Right, so about Gus. Hank, a few months ago I asked Nerdfighters to find my favorite book from childhood, which I told them was called Gus is a Bug; and then they did find it despite the significant hurdle of it actually not being called Gus is a Bug. But Hank, what Nerdfighters didn't know at the time was that by finding Gus is a Bug, they were actually giving me a baby warming present.

I loved that book so much as a kid, that I wanna give it to my baby. I couldn't find it anywhere, because it wasn't called Gus is a Bug, so I turned to the Nerdfighters for help. And then, Nerdfighters started illustrating their own versions of Gus is a Bug, which frankly, I like even more than the original.

So with the help of many Nerdfighters, I put together this video book for my baby, which will someday be the baby's introduction to the awesomeness of Nerdfighteria. Gus is a Bug, by Nerdfighteria. Gus is a bug.

Gus has fuzz. Gus runs and runs and runs. Gus has fun in the mud.

Gus nips a bud. Yum, yum. Gus rubs his fuzz.

Gus rubs and rubs. Gus has a nap. Gus naps and naps.

Gus is up. Gus tugs and tugs. It is Gus!

Gus has no Fuzz! I wanna thank all the Nerdfighters who made illustrations of Gus - I'm sorry I couldn't include more of them. And I want to thank you all for having the decency not to abuse "Gus rubs his fuzz.

Gus rubs and rubs," in a way that you might have. I would also like to thank the Nerdfighter who made this illustration: Gus is not a bug, Gus is a Danaus Plexippus larva. Thanks for keeping me honest and reminding me that smart is cooler than cute.

Hank, DFTBA. I'll see you on Monday.