John: "Good morning, Hank; it's Tuesday" are probably the two consecutive sentences I have spoken most often in my life. It's either that or "I love you; let's get some pizza", which, y'know, I said to mom when I was four, and I say to Henry and The Yeti now. Anyway, it's Tuesday, unless you're me in which case it's actually Saturday morning.

It's Saturday because later this morning The Yeti and Henry and I are going on vacation, and on Tuesday I will be on that vacation...without a computer.

That's right, Hank, for the first time since I got this computer it's going to spend a night without me. [spoken to computer] It's okay. Shh shh shh. Willy's gonna stay too; you're gonna be fine [kisses computer]. You're okay. Shh. It's okay. I know, I know.
Hank, the reason we're leaving behind computers on this vacation is that I think sometimes it's good to reset your brain not to expect, like, a new celebrity pregnancy every day. And more generally, Hank, I'm a little worried that I've become addicted to the internet. Like, I remember at the end of 2006 when we were talking about starting Brotherhood 2.0 Sarah said to me "I don't understand how you're gonna do this because you already spend so much time on the internet." And I was like, "No, no, no ,no. Making videos is gonna replace my internet time." Like, the time I now spend falling down the rabbit hole of the internet I'm going to spend making and editing videos. I mean there wasn't even any Twitter or Tumblr. What did I do on the internet in 2006 google the weather in Dubai?

But anyway, Hank, in the manner of an addict I convinced myself that starting an online video project would decrease the amount of time I spent online.

Yeah. No.

Now, Hank, I don't want the internet to be confused about my feelings; I. Love. The internet. Like yesterday Henry and I spent 20 minutes on the Wikipedia article for whale sharks because we had a disagreement about whether whale sharks bite humans. I don't wanna brag, but I was right. And to learn all that stuff about whale sharks cost us nothing. I also think that the community and connection I feel because of the internet has made my life richer and better.

However, I am looking forward to doing a lot of reading this week without every four minutes a little part of my brain being like, "Have you checked your email? There might be something important."

So, Hank, with that said I now venture into a brave new world where human beings talk to each other in real life, and breathe on each other, and touch occasi-- it just sounds really germy. But I'm gonna do it because I think it's good for my mental health, particularly in advance of Carnegie HAAAAALL [in a high pitch voice, reminiscent of some sort of semi-sing-songy alarm], which is the sound my anxiety makes. And speaking of Carnegie Hall: nerdfighters, if you don't have tickets to Carnegie Hall I have great news. There is a link in the doobly doo where there are hundreds of places around the country, and around the world, where you can gather together to watch a live stream of the Carnegie Hall event, so go to that link and find one and then go to a nerdfighter gathering, meet new nerdfighters, etc.

And lastly, Hank, I'm really sorry something terrible or excellent happened in the last, like, three days that I don't know about and everyone's like, "why isn't he talking about this in his video?" It's because I am in the past!

Hank, thank you for the 53 wonderful terrible jokes. Don't forget to be awesome [throws up nerdfighter gang sign]. I will see you on Saturday. Everyone else will see you on Friday, but I get back on Saturday I'll see you then.