YouTube: https://youtube.com/watch?v=LCAqaXPusXI
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Duration:04:58
Uploaded:2021-01-11
Last sync:2021-01-11 23:15
How the heck did we end up here???
#10: (music plays.)  It's not transparent, it's a mirror.  

#9: No.  No.  No.  

#8: Person: Why do humans have this little mouth ridge thing?  Like, what's up with this?

H: Well, when you were a baby, before you were a baby, when you were an embryo, your face had to form.  There was a time before you had a face and there were different sections of like, stuff that would become your skin that all joined together and there's sort of, uh, there's this section, and then there was this section and this section and the three sort of all come together right here.  This is more clear with dog philtrums, like, you can really see where it happened.  Like, where the face parts came together.  You can watch videos of like, scans of embryos to see how all the pieces come together, but I find them to be unsettling.  I don't wanna force them on you.

Sometimes the face doesn't come all the way together during development.  That's called a cleft palate, but yeah, the philtrum is where, when it does come together, that's what that is and it's a little sign that we were all embryos, we were once embryos.

#7: Person: Do you know if your tooth falls out, you can just stick it back in and it will fix itself?

H: Is thi true?  It's kind of true.  So, if your tooth falls out because of tooth decay, you cannot put it back it, like, your tooth has a problem, but if your tooth falls out because it got knocked  out or you get hit with a hockey puck and the root is still intact, you can save the tooth.  This is living tissue, your teeth are alive, and you can save them, so just don't touch the root part, only touch the part that you can normally touch, and then attempt to shove it back in place.  Now, do not think I'm done now, I did it, good.  You have to go to a dentist still.  If you can't get it in your mouth, put it in some milk, this is all after you wash off any dirt, by the way, put it in some milk because that will be better for the tooth than water 'cause it's got better pH, better salt content, and so leave it in there and go to the dentist as soon as possible, but best case scenario, shove it back into your mouth and then go to the dentist and they will make sure that you shoved it in correctly or shove it in again.

#6: Person: When you get an eyelash or a dog hair in your eye and you can't get it out--

H: No one will tell you this, but there's a pouch called the lacrimal sac and all your eyelashes go into there.  By the time you're an old person like me, your lacrimal sac fills with eyelashes and then you just have to have a procedure and they don't tell you about this when you're young 'cause it's gross and they suck all the eyelashes out of your lacrimal sac and they give them to you in a small vial.  I have mine around here somewhere.  

Could you tell I was lying?  Like, at what point did you figure out I was lying?  'Cause this is important.  Just because someone in a position of authority is telling you something does not mean that they are always right.  I will be wrong about stuff sometimes and sometimes, I'll just be fucking with you. 

Anyway, they sometimes come out in your sleep and then when you're like rubbing your sleep out of your eye, there's actually a bunch of eyelashes clumped in with all the stuff, but it does eventually come out, one way or another.

#5: Twins: We're both pregnant!  What's even more amazing, the twins are married to twins.  

Person: If identical twins marry identical twins, are their offspring....genetically siblings?

H: Yeah.  Yes, that's correct.  

#4: Why don't human beings eat grass?  It's everywhere, there's an abundance of it.

H: Don't eat grass.  Don't eat grass.  Don't eat--don't eat grass.  

#3: People are always saying, Hank, you're straight, why are you so popular on gay TikTok, and I'm like, well, first of all, ehhh, but second of all, more importantly, look at me.  

#2: Person: Like my whole life, I've been told don't put metal in the microwave.  How the fuck does this work?

H: First of all, don't put metal in the microwave.  Second, this is meal, this is metal, all of the inside of your microwave is metal, and that metal will actually bounce the microwaves around (?~4:08) microwaves are a form of light, they're electromagnetic radiation.  They'll bounce around inside of your microwave, bouncing off all the walls and then get absorbed by the food.

What you don't want is a bunch of stuff that's gonna reflect those waves in weird ways so that they overlap with each other and create really hot spots and cold spots.  They might even focus the microwaves in on themselves and then like, plasmify the air in your microwave.  They could focus the microwave on the door of your microwave and like, melt the metal.

I would venture say that those little screws in your microwave, sir, they do probably slightly decrease the efficiency of your microwave by bouncing some microwaves in weird directions ,but they're not reflecting enough microwaves in enough weird directions for it to be a problem for you.

#1: Wow.  I'm so old.