Good morning, Hank.

It's Tuesday. So listen, with the help of about 1100 people, I have done something ridiculous.  But I will remind you, the ridiculous is perilously close to the sublime.  The background here is that I am in a deep, profound, loving relationship  with a fourth-tier English soccer team called AFC Wimbledon.  And just to state the obvious, when you are in love, you do ridiculous things.  Like, for the last 12 years, I've had the coveted back-of-shorts sponsorship  for Wimbledon's kit, meaning that our logo occupies the liminal space between  left thigh and buttock on their uniforms.

And that's great, Hank, don't get me wrong,  being the back-of-shorts sponsor for Wimbledon is one of the great  achievements of my life, I have no idea why it's not on my Wikipedia page,  but it wasn't enough. Wimbledon is a fan-owned club, meaning that each owner, and there are  many thousands of us, gets the same one vote in the club's leadership.  And we can't spend more money than we make because we don't have  some rich owner who can just pour money into the club. In fact, we're  one of the only teams in English football that doesn't lose money, because  we can't lose money.

So even though we have one of the  highest attendances in our league and a really wonderful stadium, we struggle.  I mean, there was a period, Hank, where over the last five years, no team in professional  English football had lost more games than AFC Wimbledon, although that period  is over, for the record. So anyway, several months ago, my long-time colleague, Stan Muller, and I  started a new series over at johnschannel where I would livestream playing video game  soccer while Stan and I would talk with a small community of people. “I remember when Hank didn't have one  for a long time, and on the talk page of his proposed Wikipedia page, somebody wrote,  “just because you have a notable brother doesn't mean you're notable.” I've also done a bunch of other livestreams,  playing Tetris and signing my name over and over again, sometimes reading  what I'm working on. And the idea of these streams is that Stan and I would take  all the Super Chat and membership money and put it toward AFC Wimbledon's playing fund.

Now, at first, the idea of being able to pay for an entire player seemed ludicrous,  but over time, the money started to add up. And with some matching funds from  Sarah and me, it was just announced this morning that we have been able to pay  for an entire AFC Wimbledon player for the rest of the season.  His name is Marcus Browne. He's 27 years old.

He's an attacking midfielder who last played  for Oxford United. Now, I don't want to get ahead of myself, but I am in love with Marcus Browne.  He is my favorite footballer of all time. Marcus, if you're watching this, I'm sorry  if that's awkward, but you have replaced Roberto Firmino as the greatest footballer  of all time in my imagination.

So Marcus spent the last few months  out of professional football entirely,  waiting for an opportunity, and I'm just so proud that Wimbledon can give him  that opportunity. In fact, I got to meet with him yesterday on Zoom.

John: I'm a huge Wimbledon fan and I've been playing FIFA as AFC Wimbledon  on YouTube. The money that I make on that has gone to your signing.

Marcus: Oh, wow. Thank you very much. Well, I'm truly grateful and like I said,  I'm very happy to be here. I'm just really happy to sort of get my feet  back under the table again and be able to work and sort of showcase my talent.  I'm very grateful, again, like I say, and thank you very much.

John: Well, I'll pass that along to all the people  who subscribed and sent Super Chats in to help pay for this, make this happen.

Marcus: Yeah, no, for sure. I actually understand it as well  because I did actually stream as well on Twitch.  I used to stream.

John: Oh, really? So yeah. Hank, former Twitch streamer and current professional footballer  Marcus Browne is a Don! Admittedly, I've never seen him play,  but I truly believe he is going to help us get promoted this season so that  I can live my dearest dream: becoming the sponsor of a third-tier  English football team.

Hank, I'm just so grateful to every single member  we have over at johnschannel and all the Super Chatters for making this ridiculous  dream a reality. I mean, Hank, over at johnschannel, we've been imagining this  for months and now it is actually— it's really happening!  I'm also so grateful to everyone at AFC Wimbledon, especially Director of Football  Craig Cope, who did not bat an eye when a YouTuber called him with a very weird idea. Wimbledon are currently in fifth place in League Two, a position that would put them  in the playoffs if the season were to end today.

There's a long way to go, but for the first time  in many years, most of our good players aren't getting poached by other clubs,  so that's wonderful. In fact, thanks to Marcus Browne, we're getting stronger midway  through the season and I really feel like something special could happen this year.  So here's to Marcus, to Wimbledon, and to ridiculous, sublime, unconquerable hope,  which really is, as it used to say on Wimbledon's advertising hoardings, the thing with feathers  that perches in the soul. Hank, I'll see you on Friday.