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How fast to you have to be to follow the sunset? How fast are mosquitos? Why does the solar system spin? Should a three-headed dog have three names? How does soap work? Why do car speedometers go so high? Why do YouTube thumbnails change sometimes? Hank Green and John Green have answers!

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Hank: Hello and welcome to Dear Hank and John!

John: Or as I prefer to think of it, Dear John and Hank.

H: It's a podcast where two brothers answer your questions, give you dubious advice, and bring you all the week's news from both Mars and AFC Wimbledon. John,

J: Yeah.

H: What was it, what was my joke, I had it before, I

J: Oh my god

H: laughing

J: I'll tell ya, little bit of behind the scenes for you all

H: I got it, I got it

J: When Hank does the intro to the podcast, about 60% of the time, I can actually hear the moment when he realizes he has not prepared a Dad joke for me

H: I have one, I just forgot it

J: I'd like to tell you, I'd like to tell you what the moment is. The moment is, he says "Hello and well Dear Hank and John, a podcast where we review different - nope that's my podcast - A podcast where we answer your questions, provide dubious advice, and bring you all the week's news from both Mars AND AFC Wimbledon." And it is in the moment before the and, every week, between Mars and AND, is the moment where's like "Oh right, a Dad joke".

H: A quarter of the time, it's like a quarter of the time. Anyway, John why does the toilet paper roll downhill?

J: Why?

H: It always rolls downhill because it just wants to get to the bottom. 

J: Mhm, I'm really glad you prepared that one in advance. 

H: I, I, I want to simplify, I feel like I've been trying too hard. I wanted to be more Dad jokey. I was just like - yeah.

J: Yeah I know what you mean., I, I, I agree that, I agree that some of the setups lately have been convoluted. I think that was an example of not trying quite hard enough, I think there's a, there's a middle somewhere where there's a joke to the joke. But it isn't -

H: Do you want - Do you want an alt? I have me, I have an alt this week, see I'm double prepared.

J: I don't - I definitely don't. What I want is for you to take that alt and have it ready next week, when we do the -

 (02:00) to (04:00)

J: -intro to the podcast.

H: It's like 25% of the time that I forget. You overestimate it, I'm working very hard. 

J: And I appreciate it, I know that it is not easy to find these Dad jokes on the internet, which, the internet, to the extent that is a, is a useful tool for humans - it is mostly a way of having GPS and a repository of Dad jokes. Those are the two primary functions of the internet. 

H: It's very good at that. 

Hanks computer: Alert

H: Woah. 

J: You alright there?

H: My computer just made a loud noise.

J: I don't like that noise.

H: That's the noise that means you have a meeting in one hour, so let's get going John - you want to answer some questions from our listenerers.

J: Let's answer some questions from our listeners, beginning with this one from Samantha, who writes "Dear John and Hank, I am currently reading the New York Times bestseller The Anthropocene Reviewed by critically acclaimed author John Green" - Thank you Samantha, It's a great first sentence to a question. - "I'm on the chapter about sunsets and the question I have is: I you wanted to continuously see the sunset, how fast would you have to travel? Sunsets and salamanders, Samantha."

H: Uhhh, depnds on where you are. 

J: That's true. Because if you're at the equator

H: Yeah

J: I believe it's about a thousand miles an hour

H: Yes but the

J: But, correct me if I'm wrong here Hank, if you're at the north pole and it's the right time of year, it's zero miles per hour.

H: Yeah you just stand there. Because basically what you're talking about here is you want to be moving as fast as the Earth is going, so you're like, counteracting the spin of the Earth by walking or - hah walking - a thousand miles an hour in the opposite direction.

J: Yeah

H: Uh and uh like but the Earth spins at different speeds at different places because the Earth has different circumferences at different places. So if you imagine the widest part of the circumference of the Earth is the equator and then it's thinner as you go to the top until, functionally, mathematically, the Earth has zero circumference at the very tip. So if you are just standing there then you are just sort of spinning in place. 

J: Right 

H: Math!


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